As I sit on my rock, watching my two friends sleeping, I can't stop the single tear that is rolling down my cheek. It's been two days since Boromir died, two days since the fellowship failed. And two days since I lost the one I love more than anyone. I loved Boromir from when we first met and, as we travelled together in the fellowship, my feelings for him grew deeper. I fought to keep them hidden, scared that he would reject me if he knew how I felt. If I'd known that I was going to lose him, I would have found the courage to tell him. Maybe he would have been shocked or disgusted; maybe he did feel the same way. Either way, things could have been different. As it is, I will never know...
The tears are coming now and I stop trying to hold them back. Burying my head in my arms, for fear that my sobs will awaken the others, I let myself cry for the first time since it happened, as my mind drifts back to that day...to the one question that has haunted me since Boromir died. If I had been there, could I have prevented his death?
By the time I reached him it was too late. He had already gone. He died before I could tell him how much I loved him. The thought of Boromir, my Boromir, fighting all those orcs alone saddens me greatly. I always knew that Boromir was a proud man who would not willingly accept help, but the one time he needed help, that help came too late. I wasn't there when he needed me, I should have been fighting by his side and I wasn't. And I hate myself for letting that happen.
A hand on my shoulder shakes me from my memories and I suddenly remember that I'm supposed to be on guard. Even without turning, I know who it is.
"Aragorn" I say softly. "I'm sorry, I wasn't..."
"Legolas?" Aragorn's voice is heavy with concern. "Are you crying?"
"No" I whisper, and then ask myself why I'm lying to my friend. "Yes" I admit, before breaking down again. Aragorn puts his arms around me and holds me close.
"Boromir?" he asked quietly. "Don't worry, Legolas. His death has been hard on all of us"
"I loved him," I whisper into Aragorn's shoulder. "I loved him Aragorn, and he never knew..."
"He did know" Aragorn told me softly. "He knew," he repeated. "And he...he loved you in return, but he was scared to tell you"
"I wish he hadn't died"
"Ssssh" Aragorn whispered. "I know it's hard, but somehow we have to cope. Boromir died protecting Merry and Pippin from the orcs and we can't let his death be in vain. That's not what he would have wanted."
"No" I agreed. "It isn't. He would have wanted us to keep going"
"That's right. It's hard Legolas, but you have to let him go. Maybe you should get some sleep. You look exhausted"
"I will in a bit" I promised him, quickly wiping my eyes. "I just need a few moments alone"
"Fine" Aragorn turned away from me and disappeared into the trees. I sat there for a moment, watching Glimi to make sure he really was asleep. Finally, I knew what I wanted to say.
"Boromir" I said quietly. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you and that I didn't get to say goodbye. I love you, and I wish that things could have been different, but I'll never forget you. You'll always be in my heart. Goodbye Boromir...my love"
As I wiped the last tear from my eyes, I felt a cool breeze blowing around me and I knew that it was Boromir's way of saying goodbye. And although my heart was still heavy with grief, as I lay down beside Glimi, I realised that I did feel just a bit better.
"Goodbye Boromir" I repeated softly. "I love you"
And as I drifted into a restless sleep, I thought I heard him say,
"I love you too."
Site InfoWe are the home of 1292 authors from among our 2536 members. There have been 2904 reviews written about our 3820 stories consisting of 10734 chapters and 29400445 words. A special welcome to our newest member, Mmd.
Help us keep one of the oldest running LotR archives available to all. Even the smallest donation helps!
Many thanks to our previous donors!
Many thanks to our previous donors!
The Library, elsewhere
Livejournal | Tumblr | Forum | RSS
My Love by Silver15
Chapter end notes: Well, I don't think that turned out too badly. I'm not good at this sort of stuff, but I had the idea and just had to write it. I'd add more, but its late and I'm tired so I think I'll go to bed now...If you liked it, please leave a review.