The door to the hotel room closed behind them. Viggo, eager to be reunited with his lover after so long apart, pressed the other man up against the wall and began kissing him, open mouthed and hungry. He was startled when he felt gentle hands on his shoulders, pushing him back and away. Dark eyes regarded him with an expression that was far more somber than he expected.
"No really, Viggo. I was serious when I said that we needed to talk."
Orlando moved out from between Viggo's body and the wall, and seated himself in one of the plush chairs of his suite. His elbows rested on his knees, and he ran his hands through his hair, leaving them grasping the top of his head, hair curling out between his fingers in wild directions.
He did not look happy. He looked nervous. Actually, upon further study, Viggo thought that he looked scared. Viggo himself started to get seriously worried, wondering what was so serious that Orlando couldn't discuss it with him outside the privacy of this room.
Viggo took a seat in the arm chair next to Orlando's. "What's wrong?"
Orlando sighed. He opened his mouth to say something, then stopped. It was clear that he was having a hard time putting whatever was bothering him into words.
"It's okay, Orlando. You know you can tell me anything."
"That's just it, though, Viggo. It's not okay. It is so fucking far from being okay, that I'm not sure I can handle it."
Viggo placed a comforting hand on Orlando's. The other man seemed to draw strength from the touch. Still not able to meet Viggo's eyes, he spoke.
Of all the things that Viggo expected Orlando to say, this certainly was not one of them. His eyes widened, his mouth opened in a startled expression. His heart thudded in his chest.
It was a shock to Viggo's system, hearing this news. He felt angry and hurt because Orlando had been so careless. Because Orlando was now tied to Kate in a way that he never would be. Because although he knew that Orlando and Kate were together mainly for the sake of their careers, this news came as proof that their relationship had gone beyond the professional level. Of course, he had always known on some level that Orlando was sleeping with Kate. He had just never wanted to acknowledge this fact, and had filed it away in the back of his mind, along with other bits of information that he preferred not to dwell upon.
Orlando raised his head to look at Viggo, his expression pained as he waited for the other man to say something.
Viggo snapped out of the shocked state he was in, and looked at his lover -his friend - who was obviously in need of help, advice and reassurance. Viggo could understand. Viggo could relate. Excene became pregnant before he married her - that was, in fact, the reason that he had married her. He didn't regret it for an instant, as it had brought Henry into his life.
But then, at the time, he hadn't been involved in a long term relationship with somebody other than Excene, as Orlando was now.
Viggo closed his eyes and drew a deep calming breath, trying to reign in the anger and hurt that he was feeling. Trying not to be jealous and selfish, because he never could be selfish where Orlando was concerned. That is, unless another lover was involved.
He opened his eyes, and brought them to meet Orlando's, which were dark and worried.
"How did this happen? Weren't you being careful?"
"We were. We are. She's on the pill. That thing is supposed to be 98% effective. We were part of the unlucky 2%." *
"So what are you going to do?"
"I don't know. We're still trying to figure this whole thing out. It is up to her, really. I mean, she's only 20. She knows she's too young. There are options, man. Many options. We have to figure it out."
"How far along is she?"
"Just a couple of weeks. She just told me the other day. I wanted to tell you myself, in person."
Orlando drew another deep breath.
"She thinks that she wants to keep the baby."
The feeling of shock that Viggo felt intensified. While he didn't like the idea of abortion, he considered himself to be pro-choice. All the same, Kate's desire to keep the baby shocked him - the idea of a young woman just starting her career in Hollywood carrying a pregnancy to full term seemed like a sort of professional suicide. Not to mention the impact that it would have on Orlando, and on his and Orlando's relationship...
"Viggo, its still not certain what we're going to do. I mean, there is her career to think about - and mine - but she doesn't want to end the pregnancy. She says she knows of other actresses who have given birth at a young age, and who have gone on to have successful careers." **
"Her career is not what I'm worried about. What is this going to mean to you? To us?"
"I don't know. Everybody is going to know that the baby is mine. People are going to expect us to get married."
"Do you want to do that?"
"No. But I'm sure that Robin is going to do her darndest to see that is what happens."
"But it won't change anything for us, Viggo."
"That's where you're wrong, Orlando. It changes this. It changes everything."
Orlando grasped Viggo's hand tightly. "I won't let it."
"Orlando, you will have no choice. Don't you get it? This is a child we are talking about here. A living, breathing human being. Your child. Yours and Kate's."
Viggo got out of the chair, Orlando's hand still clasped with his. "Viggo, really. We'll figure something out! We have to... " Orlando looked up at him with stricken eyes. "I love you." He let the words hang in the air, hoping that they would be enough to keep Viggo with him.
"I know you do. I love you too." Viggo said these words sadly, with a look of resignation in his eyes. "But right now, I'm not sure that is enough. I have to go. I have to get out of here. This... this can't continue. You have to figure things out. And until you do, we can't be together."
"Please don't go." Orlando's voice was sad and small. Despite the hurt that Viggo was feeling, a pang of guilt twisted in his gut at the thought of leaving Orlando alone when he had so clearly come to him for help.
"I need some time alone to think about this Orlando. I'll be there for you -whatever you need. I'll help you get through it. I just can't deal with it right now. I need some space."
A deep sigh issued from Orlando's body. "Okay."
Viggo walked to the door of the suite, and took one last look back at the man sitting slumped in the armchair. He looked dejected and troubled. And as much as Viggo wanted to take him in his arms and make the pain go away, he knew that this time it wasn't possible to do that.
What had previously been a complicated relationship had just become difficult.
Opening the door and walking outside, his heart broke as he realized that what he had with Orlando may truly be over. There are some burdens that a relationship can bear - and others that break it.
This burden changed everything. And there was no going back.
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Story notes: Notes: I am so, so sorry for this. I just had to. Please don't hurt me.
Disclaimer: I don't know Viggo or Orlando (or Kate, for that matter). Nor do I have any knowledge regarding their sexual orientations or personal life. This is a work of fiction, pure and simple.
Chapter notes: LJ: http://abluegirl.livejournal.com/
Chapter end notes: * Note - I actually know girls who got pregnant while taking the pill as instructed. It does happen.
** I'm thinking specifically of Reese Witherspoon, but then, she always has been extraordinary.