Switch by Morgana

Story notes: Do you really expect my writing to make sense? This story was beta read by Aduial. Thanks sweetie for the effort and time you put into my ravings! All remaining mistakes are mine!
"I will finish these letters. Why don't you go for a walk in the woods with your children? I am certain they would love to spend time with you." Erestor placed one sheet of paper on a rising pile and started on the next letter. He would be busy writing replies to Celeborn and Thranduil for the next few hours; there was no need for Elrond to remain locked up in the study with him.

"That is excellent advice," said Elrond, slowly rising from his chair. He swept his hair back, which had managed to fall in front of his face, and gathered his burgundy robes closer to his body. "Are you certain you can manage on your own?"

"Of course," replied Erestor, giving Elrond a mock smile. "Go on, then. Don't let them wait." Ever since Celebrían's departure the three children had tried to spend as much time as possible with their father. Although the Lady had left for the Undying Lands centuries ago, she was still sorely missed by her family, and the four remaining members had turned to one another for comfort.

Elrond walked toward the doorway, relieved to have such a competent and devoted Chief Advisor. He wouldn't have known what to do without Erestor to fall back on. Erestor had ruled Imladris for some years, whilst Elrond and his children had gone through a long and exhausting mourning process. "Thank you, my friend." But Erestor was more than just a friend – he was his best friend and confidant.

Erestor shooed Elrond from the study and watched the door close behind the half-Elf. Sometimes he wished the Elven Sickness would finally take told hold of him and claim him, thus ending his miserable life. But apparently he didn't love Elrond enough to be affected in such a manner. Sighing, he returned to his work.

He had fallen in love with Elrond when he had first seen the half-Elf at the foot of Mount Orodruin. He had been one of Ereinion's best strategists and Captains, and had agreed to help the High-King win this battle against evil. Erestor had never counted on falling in love that day. Elrond had stood behind the High-King in a possessive manner; it was clear for all who bothered to look that they were lovers. However, that realization had come too late for Erestor. He had already fallen for the Peredhel, and had buried that feeling deep inside ever since. When Elrond had married Celebrían he had hoped that these feelings would go away, but that had never happened and he had suffered from unrequited love since then.

"Why are you still here?" Glorfindel, smiling brightly and clearly in an excellent mood, strode into the study. He sat down on the desk, picked up some random papers and waved them at the Chief Advisor. "Most inhabitants are taking some time off to walk the gardens, listen to our minstrels' songs and tales, or are simply enjoying a moment of peace and quiet whilst you are still working here. Why?" Erestor had been an enigma at first, but Glorfindel had quickly learned the dark-haired Elf cared deeply about Elrond and his family. He had seen the tears – quickly wiped away – when the twins or Arwen had come running to Elrond in distress because they missed their mother. Throughout the millennia they had become friends, but even now, Erestor remained somewhat of a riddle. "Maybe we could join Lindir and the other minstrels in the Hall of Fire?"

Glorfindel easily registered the pained expression in Erestor's eyes. The advisor had never quite mastered hiding his feelings perfectly, and Glorfindel had decided long ago that the other Elf was suffering emotionally for some obscure reason. If only he could find out what was causing Erestor such suffering! "Why don't you tell me what your heart desires? Maybe I can help?" He had offered to help before, but Erestor had always declined, keeping him at a distance.

"First off, I am here because I need to finish Elrond's correspondence." Erestor paused, uncertain what to add. He had never been able to lash out at people when he felt cornered, and Glorfindel was especially was hard to scold. The golden-haired Elf radiated a sincere desire to help. In a softer voice he added, "And secondly, my heart is mine to worry about, Glorfindel. I feel honored that you are concerned about my well-being and that you want to help, but you cannot."

Glorfindel studied Erestor extensively, wondering what was haunting the dark-haired Elf. "Is it love?" He knew he was crossing a line, as Erestor was always terribly possessive of his privacy, but he had to know!

"Love..." Erestor cleared his throat, which felt constricted all of a sudden. "On my part it is, but not on his."

Glorfindel's eyes widened; he had never expected Erestor to reply! "Whom does your heart desire, then?" He hoped that Erestor didn't desire him, for he was already happy with his beloved, which unfortunately wasn't in Imladris at present. But no, it surely wasn't him. Erestor had never hinted at such infatuation.

"I cannot tell you that, my friend," said Erestor, and a sorrowful smile surfaced on his face. "But rest assured, it isn't you whom I love." He had caught the apprehension on Glorfindel's face and instantly reassured the other.

Glorfindel balanced precariously on the corner of the desk, leaning in closer toward Erestor. "Then I strongly urge you to tell the Elf of your heart that you desire him."

"Don't you think I already did that!?" Erestor lost his composure momentarily, and his eyes blazed his frustration at Glorfindel.

"You told him?" Glorfindel's eyes widened further. "And this fool rejected you?" Glorfindel shook his head firmly. "I don't believe that!" Erestor was handsome, intelligent, could be charming when he wanted to be, and was utterly desirable. "Who in his right mind would deny you?"

Erestor felt flattered, seeing Glorfindel's expression of disbelief. He still vividly recalled the moment he had told Elrond. He had been careful not to mention the name of this Elf who was in love with the Lord of Imladris when he had told Elrond. He had merely hinted that there was an Elf utterly in love with the half-Elf, but Elrond had shaken his head in a rueful way. The Peredhel had then explained that he didn't plan on taking a lover ever again and that his heart would always belong to his wife. Erestor had waited so long before telling Elrond and had realized that moment that his love had been doomed from the start. Since then, he had tried falling out of love with Elrond, but that had proven impossible. He still loved the half-Elf with his entire heart.

Worried about the distant look in Erestor's eyes, Glorfindel waved a hand in front of the advisor. "Erestor? Where are you with your thoughts? Or should I ask, with whom?"

Erestor raised a hand in an attempt to stop Glorfindel from talking. "This is a private affair; don't concern yourself with my problems."

"But I want to see you happy!" declared Glorfindel. Imladris was a depressing place to live in these days. Arwen and the twins still mourned losing their mother and Elrond wasn't moving on either, still clinging to the loss. Imladris' weather had been bleak, cold and very wet during these last few centuries and Glorfindel longed for the return of spring, sun and flowers. Seeing Erestor suffer as well was just too much. "Tell me his name and I will try to mediate. Maybe he has changed his mind and is now interested in you?"

"I have told him. I have asked him. He wasn't. Let it rest, Glorfindel," said Erestor in a cold, clipped voice.

But Glorfindel detected the hurt beneath the composed voice and tried again. "Maybe he has changed his mind?"

"I doubt that very much," said Erestor in a slightly sarcastic voice. "Glorfindel, I know that he doesn't desire me in turn, and I am telling you to let it rest for the very last time." Erestor let his dark hair fall in front of his face and pretended to return to his correspondence.

Glorfindel wasn't fooled, and wondered if he should try again to make Erestor open up to him.

"Now kindly leave me so I can finish today's work." Erestor refused to look at Glorfindel. He couldn't take the risk of the blond reading the loneliness in his large, chocolate brown eyes. He needed Glorfindel to leave before he lost his composure and told the Captain the truth!

Glorfindel sighed, deeply, wishing he had been able to make Erestor confide in him, but he couldn't force his friend to tell him. "I really wish I could help you, Erestor." He got up from the desk and walked toward the doorway. Compassion echoed in his voice when he said, "I was sincere when I said that I want you to be happy."

Erestor finally found the courage to look up from his paperwork and make eye contact with his friend. "I know you were." He managed a weak smile and then said, "But this is out of your hands, my friend."

Glorfindel grumbled softly, "If only you would tell me; you would find that my influence reaches far!"

"Not that far," replied Erestor, whose smile was genuine and sincere. "But thank you for being a good friend." Glorfindel mumbled something unintelligible and Erestor smiled kindly when the golden-haired Elf finally left the study, his departure restoring some semblance of peace to his private, little world. "I know you mean well, Glorfindel, but no one can help me. Elrond's heart will remain locked for all eternity."

Saddened by this realization -- but accepting of it -- Erestor returned to his work.




"I have had enough of this," whispered Lórien, exasperated. This Elf had been suffering in silence for centuries because he lacked the courage to admit his love to Elrond. Had the half-Elf known it was Erestor who was in love with him, things would have developed differently. Glorfindel offered to help and yet Erestor declined that offer. The time for words had passed; it was time to act and the Vala knew exactly what to do in order to get the stubborn advisor and half-Elf together. He would carry out the first stage of his plan tonight, when Erestor and Glorfindel were soundly asleep. He chuckled, amused and confident that his meddling would work out. After all, these two Elves were destined to be together.




Elrond slipped into a comfortable night shirt, and then retired to his lonely bed. Sleep wouldn't come easy for him; it never did these days. His insomnia had begun when his wife had left and his nights were spent worrying and brooding. Could he have done something different so Celebrían would have overcome the abuse? Could he have tried harder? Should he have traveled with her to the Undying Lands? But no, his place was here still, his role not yet played out.

Tossing and turning, he realized this would be another restless night, filled with troubled thoughts.




Erestor went to bed after finishing all correspondences. Lying on the bed, naked, and only covered by a thin sheet, he wondered how to survive the daily torture of having Elrond close enough to touch and yet out of his reach forever. Sleep didn't come easy for him either.




Glorfindel, however, was already soundly asleep. He had trained with his men during the day, and he had even joined the border patrol for some hours before returning to his rooms. The moment his head touched the pillow he was already half asleep. He never realized a Vala had entered his room, and was totally oblivious to the fact that Lórien was seated on the side of his bed.

Lórien smiled gently, leaned in closer and pressed a kiss onto Glorfindel's brow. I hope you will understand. You are the only one strong and cunning enough to successfully carry out this assignment. I trust in you to make Elrond and Erestor open up to each other. This will only be temporary, but I cannot tell you that and you did volunteer to help. I hope you will succeed where Erestor failed.

Rising from the bed, he vanished from Glorfindel's rooms, only to manifest in Erestor's. The troubled, raven-haired Elf was finally asleep, and the Vala bent forward, kissing Erestor's brow as well, setting certain things into motion. Hopefully, Elrond and Erestor would realize the truth about the other and stop pretending they didn't love each other.




Argh, he felt like he hadn't slept at all! Glorfindel squeezed his eyes tightly shut, blocking out Arien's first rays. It wouldn't be long before his second-in-command would knock on his door, and he refused to leave his bed just yet. It was warm, and too comfortable. Snuggling back beneath the blankets, he tried to lock out the outside world and return to the realm of dreams.

But in the end his conscience kicked him in the butt, telling him to leave the bed and get ready for this morn's inspections. He couldn't be late; he had to set an example for the others. Stretching like a cat, he groaned, still reluctant to leave his warm nest. Eyes still closed, he sat upright, stretched again and frowned, wondering why his muscles felt this tense. He hadn't worked that strenuously yesterday! Shaking his head, he rose from the bed and ran a hand through his hair, encountering knots and tangles, which was most odd. His hair hardly ever got tangled. Stumbling forward, he extended one hand to open the bathroom door. It was a good thing he knew his way around his rooms blindly, for he was just too lazy to open his eyes yet.

His hand, however, didn't encounter a wooden door but a stone wall. Cracking open one eye in surprise, he found himself in different surroundings than expected. Reluctantly, the other eye opened as well. Blinking, he quickly identified the rooms he was in as Erestor's private chambers. What in Elbereth's name was he doing here? He was certain he had gone to sleep in his own rooms last night! So how had he gotten here?

Turning around, his long hair fell in front of his eyes, and he gasped at the color of the long strands. Raven-black? Since when was his hair raven-black? Oh no, this wasn't happening, couldn't be happening! Grabbing hold of a strand, he stared at the dark hair in disbelief. No, this wasn't his hair. Definitely not his hair!

Panic suddenly took him, making his heart beat wildly in his chest and causing him to break out in a cold sweat. Recalling the location of Erestor's bathroom, he stormed in there and came to a halt in front of the mirror. His reflection made his eyes go wide, and he groaned loudly.

"Oh no!" Reaching out to steady himself, he placed one hand against the wall. Shocked, he glared at the reflection that stared back at him. He knew that face, but it wasn't his. It was Erestor's that was staring back at him! His knees went weak and he nearly collapsed against the wall, but his ingrained discipline made him face this situation. "Am I still dreaming? I must still be dreaming!" In order to test his theory he tugged hard at a dark strand of hair. "Ouch!" He had felt that! Not asleep then!

"No, this isn't happening! This can't be happening!" Panting hard, he continued to stare at the reflection. But there was no denying that it was Erestor's face in the mirror. Large, dark, brown eyes carried a shocked expression. The mouth, lined by red, luscious lips was agape and the long frame shook with tremors. "Ai!" He was naked on top of that! He didn't want to see Erestor naked! Grabbing hold of a morning robe, he slipped into it and pulled the fabric close to his body, clutching it like a life line. "No.... No... No!" Leaning against the wall, he shook his head, repeating the same word over and over again. "No... No... No!" This wasn't real. He had to be dreaming! This time he pinched his arm, but, aiya, he had felt that too! "Why? How?"

His breathing was finally slowing down, but his panic remained. "I am not Erestor!"

But you inhabit his body, supplied a tiny voice from the back of his head.

"I don't want to inhabit his body..." Glorfindel shivered fiercely, and continued to shake his head. "I don't want this!" But no one answered him and after a few more minutes of staring at his reflection he began to calm down. "Why? Why did this happen?" Oh, it was most odd to hear Erestor's voice echo through the bathroom and to feel Erestor's hair sweep against his skin. It was hard to believe this was really happening.

"Oh, damn!" Losing the mental struggle, he slid down onto the floor. He ended up sitting cross-legged on the bathroom floor, staring at the raven strands that teased against his hands. "Erestor, I just know you are to blame for this somehow!" Then he realized something else. "Oh, Elbereth, if I am in his body... is he in mine?"




"Ooooohhhh," Erestor purred softly, wrapped up in warm animal skins that made a most delightful blanket. Rubbing his cheek against the softness, his fingers caressed the fur. What a lovely way to wake up. Who had bestowed this gift on him? Normally no one paid much attention to him, and now someone had given him this? Curling up beneath the fur, he continued to purr his contentment, wishing he didn't have to leave this warm bed, but duty called. Elrond expected him in his study and there was so much paperwork to catch up on! And there is also Legolas' upcoming visit. The Crown Prince of Mirkwood would visit Imladris shortly.

Rooms had to be readied, banquets arranged, guards assigned... endless chores, which would demand most of his time during the next few days. The only good thing was that arranging for Legolas' visit enabled him to spend more time with Elrond, discussing seating arrangements and other matters. Oh, Elrond... The mere thought of the half-Elf caused him to mew softly. Just once... He would do anything to kiss Elrond just once – to know the softness and taste of those lips. But that was wishful thinking.

A few more moments of warmth and rest; that was all he wanted. He wasn't a morning person – had never been one. Instead, he loved to walk beneath the starlit sky at night. But too many nights he had walked alone and his heart yearned for company. For Elrond's company, to be exact.

Waking up fully, he looked up at the ceiling, expecting Ithil and a blanket of stars to greet him. He had the ceiling painted when he had moved into these rooms, and each morning he enjoyed the sight over new. But not this morning. A green canopy, embroidered with golden flowers greeted him instead. Most strange, he thought, slowly sitting up. A quick and thorough sweep of the room told him he wasn't in his private chambers, but in Glorfindel's. He had visited the golden-haired Captain once or twice, and remembered the interior. "What am I doing—" His eyes widened at the sound of the voice. Not his voice! Most certainly not his voice! He was up on his feet within seconds and nearly smashed into the wall, finding his legs more muscular than he remembered. And why were there scars on his thigh?

Experimentally, he ran a fingertip along the scar. Strange... he had thought his fingernails to be slightly longer, and not that neatly clipped. The fingers seemed slightly shorter, the hand a bit sturdier. Raising the hand, he stared at it, instinctively knowing it wasn't his. Next, a lock of golden hair tumbled in front of his face, blocking his view. Golden hair? Golden hair!

Erestor felt paralyzed, but then released a loud scream. Panting hard and shaking over his entire body, he stared at the beige nightshirt. He never wore nightshirts to bed! Oh, what was going on here? A mirror on the opposite wall caught his reflection and he sagged against one of the poles of the big four-poster bed.

Where was he? Where was Erestor? Why did the mirror only show him Glorfindel's delicate features? What madness had robbed him of his mind? Stumbling, he made his way over to the mirror, and placed one hand against the glass. Oh, this was definitely real. The mirror only showed Glorfindel, because there was only one Elf standing in front of it. "But I am not Glorfindel! I am Erestor!" But even the voice was Glorfindel's! His heart missed several beats, making him gasp for his next breath. That moment, his world darkened and he sagged into a pathetic heap onto the bed.




Glorfindel opened Erestor's wardrobe and stared. "Black, why am I not surprised?" There were about thirty sets of robes, and most of them were black. Looking through them, he found one gray robe, three brown ones, one in dark sienna, and one robe made of the finest dark green velvet. Shuddering at the idea of having to wear that dreadful black, he selected the green robes and slipped into them. "That's so depressing, Erestor. Why black?"

Glorfindel returned to the mirror to check his appearance. The raven mane, which Erestor usually wore loose, was now securely braided, and wouldn't hinder him again by tumbling in front of his face. During this one waking hour in which he had inhabited Erestor's body, he had already learned a lot about the other Elf.

Although the rooms were spacious and even slightly luxurious, they were devoid of personal belongings, save for a few sketches of Elrond hidden away between volumes of books. He had expected scrolls and tomes to fill these rooms, and if he remembered correctly, the last time he had been here, they had lain sprawled all over the room. But they were gone now and plants and flowers had taken their place, giving these chambers a warmer, more personal feel. Yet, he still didn't feel comfortable here. Not because he was an intruder, but because Erestor's interior spoke of loneliness.

Loneliness... Glorfindel wondered if therein lay the reason for this body switch.

After stepping into soft, leather boots, he opened the door and peeked into the corridor. He planned on making his way to his rooms unseen, as he had no desire to explain why Erestor was sneaking into Glorfindel's rooms in the morn, instinctively knowing no one would believe his story. For now he had to carry on like he was Erestor. He only hoped Erestor was also coping with this unsettling situation.




For once Glorfindel was grateful that he seldom locked the door to his rooms. He pushed the door open and then soundlessly moved inside. "Erestor?" Oh, hearing the advisor's voice flowing from his mouth instead of his own would take a long time to get used to! Quickly scanning the bedroom, he easily located Erestor's crumpled form on the bed – or to be more precise, he detected his own collapsed body on the bed. Frozen to the spot, he stared at his own body. By the Valar, this was so weird! Glorfindel shook his head, trying to break the spell and then slowly advanced on the bed. "Erestor!" His mouth went dry, seeing the tormented expression on the other Elf's face. The way his body laid, he quickly deduced that Erestor must have been looking at the mirror. "I reckon you have found out then. I need you awake, Erestor!" Climbing onto his bed, he knelt beside Erestor. He was tempted to shake him awake, but wasn't sure what effect that would have on the Chief Advisor. No, he had to be careful around Erestor for now.

Deciding on his course of action he pulled Erestor close, until the golden-haired head rested in his lap. Tenderly brushing the fair hair, he grinned. Now there was a new experience! His lover had often told him that he found him handsome – beautiful beyond words – and Glorfindel was beginning to see why his beloved thought so. The slightly sun-tanned face was handsome, with elegantly curved cheekbones and was framed by long, blond – almost golden – strands. "I am handsome!" he said, giggling.

Erestor stirred unexpectedly and Glorfindel held his breath, knowing Erestor was in for the surprise of his life when the advisor regained consciousness. Oh, this is going to be fun!
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