Frodo's Miss Adventure by Kathryn Ramage

Sam didn't say anything until after they had left the Mayor's Hall and seen Lad and Angelica off down a side-lane to their own home with their little daughter asleep in Lad's arms. After they had waved their farewells and the Whitfoots had gone out of sight, the other two turned and headed along the high street. Sam said, "You might've managed that better," with a gentle note of reproach, for he was reluctant to criticize Frodo. "You don't know what you're getting into with these racing folk. Some of 'em take it awful serious. It's no game. I've seen folk get angry as a nest of hornets sometimes when the pony they pick comes up slow."

"It was the best solution I could find to a delicate situation," answered Frodo. "It's not the sort of detective work we're used to, but I thought I could at least act as Lad's advocate and see that he isn't slandered. If I can make these brutes listen to reason, then Lad's problem is solved. If they won't... Well, if it comes to it, surely people will take my word for Lad's character over a pair of unsavory creatures who bear a grudge against him. Have you seen these brothers Lad was talking about, by the way?"

"Not so's I'd know 'em," Sam admitted. "There's lots of tough-looking folk hanging about the races. I didn't see Lad talking to anybody like that today, but I wasn't with him every minute. Lad rides in the races, and I was a-sitting off on the sides with Milo and his little lad most of the time. D'you want me to keep an eye out tomorrow?"

"Would you, Sam? I'll be seeing them later in the day, but until then, you can see that Lad comes to no harm." They had reached the center of Michel Delving, and Frodo realized that Sam was not heading toward the eastward road and the fairfields which lay on the outskirts of town. "Aren't we staying at the Fairview Inn?" The Fairview was on the road across from the fairgrounds.

"I got us a room at the White Chestnut," Sam explained, and waved a hand to indicate the smaller and older inn on the far side of the market square. The square itself was full of tables and booths with covered wares for tomorrow's crafts fair as if it were a market day. "They're all crowded up by the fairfields tonight, and as you was at his Mayorship's house, I thought you'd rather come here than walk a mile outside o' town. This un's closer, and quieter too."

These were all plausible excuses, but Frodo wasn't fooled. He knew the true reason for this choice: Sam was trying to keep him away from Merry. It seemed that Sam would never be able to forget that he and Merry had been lovers for a year, nor forgive it.

"Will you be going out to the races yourself, Frodo?" Sam asked once they had entered the White Chestnut.

"I might pop in early on," Frodo replied. "I may be able to make arrangements with Lad before the first races begin." Then he added impishly, "I certainly want to say hello to Pip and Merry. I haven't seen them in ages." It had been three months since he'd left them in Buckland. From his cousins' occasional letters, he knew that Pippin was staying on at Crickhollow after he'd left the cottage empty and the two were settling into their old ways, much as he and Sam had.

After this announcement, Sam gave Frodo an uneasy glance or two as they went to their room. It wasn't until the door was shut and they were alone that he asked, "D'you want to see Master Merry so bad as that?"

"Yes, I do, but not in the way you think." He didn't wish Sam to feel jealous, but Frodo meant to make it clear that even if he and Merry had parted as lovers, they were still good friends and he intended to see Merry as a friend whenever he pleased. "Sam, you're being very silly about this. Are you afraid that if I so much as see Merry again, I'll want to go back to him?"

Sam didn't answer, but Frodo knew it was so.

"You're wrong," he said. "All that's over and done with. I made my choice, when I realized you were right about us spending what time I had left together."

Sam still looked a little doubtful. "You're not sorry you did?"

"No, not at all," Frodo assured him. "But I suppose the only way I can prove that to you is to show you."

If there was anything he missed by giving up his relationship with Merry, it was their openness. For a few months, he had known the freedom of living his life without secrets. In Minas Tirith, all their old friends had known what he and Merry were to each other and had accepted it. Their family in Buckland had likewise known and, for the most part, hadn't disapproved. Frodo had even been able to tell a few acquaintances about himself without embarrassment. It was an exhilarating experience.

When he'd agreed to return to Sam, he'd left that freedom behind. There was no way that they could make the true nature of their relationship public without scandal and disgrace--and that would harm Sam even more than himself. Hobbiton had heard the gossip about him and Merry; Frodo knew that his Baggins relatives and neighbors were wondering about him, perhaps recalling old gossip about his friendship with Sam, but as long as he gave them no evidence of the truth, they could only whisper and make guesses, and even this must die down in time. By returning to Sam, he must live in secret again. He and Sam could never walk down the high street arm in arm as a couple. He could never kiss Sam when they were out where others might see. But these were sacrifices he was willing to make for the sake of the private life they had together.

He held out his arms to invite Sam to him. "Now come to bed."
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