"Help me, would you?"
Haldir looked up from the bed at Legolas. He was bare to the waist, though Haldir couldn't say he would have minded if the pants came off, too. "Do what? Get undressed? Because if it's anything else, I'm too tired."
"I knew my father should never have made you commander. You're useless."
"No, I'm good in bed. That's what counts. Your father understands that."
It took a second for that to sink in. A look of disgust crossed Legolas's face. "No, Haldir. Don't tell me you did."
"Did what?" asked Haldir, finally rising from his bed (actually, it was Legolas's) and took Legolas in his arms. He began to kiss his way down the pale, flawless flesh.
But Legolas forced him to stop. "You slept with my father?"
Haldir bit his lip, not looking at Legolas. "Only once."
Legolas closed his eyes. "I cannot believe you. You never told me that. And it's really disturbing, to say the least."
"If it's any consolation, I like you much better."
"That was far more than I needed to know. But we digress. I asked you to help me."
"Do what?"
"Unless you forgot at some point, today we do happen to have to go delve into the sewers, and that would require me to be slightly more dressed than I am at this point."
"I can't say I agree."
"Help me, idiot."
"Well, I don't give without getting in return."
"If you're implying what I think you are, the answer is no. I don't want to deal with that right before I go into a life-threatening situation."
"So you'd rather go into battle hard?"
"Much rather than sleep with you."
Haldir tightened his grip around Legolas, then thought better of it and dropped to his knees in front of Legolas. He kissed Legolas's belly button and heard Legolas moan slightly. "I think I've changed your mind, haven't I?"
"You're going to have to do more than that to change my mind." He pulled Haldir up and kissed him. "But I don't have time for this right now. Maybe later." He kissed Haldir again.
"You don't love me, do you?"
Legolas was taken aback by this question. Never before had love come into the equation. He had always assumed that what was between them was purely casual. He fought back the immediate reflex to say 'I love Aragorn' and considered the question honestly. Did he love Haldir? Sure, they had lots of fun and Legolas had gotten a certain amount of comfort from Haldir because he missed Aragorn. But love? His love was to Aragorn first, and then to his wife. Was there any room left for Haldir? He didn't think so. Slowly, he shook his head. "No, I don't."
Haldir nodded. That had hurt, but he had been expecting it. With only a skill an elf could possess, he retained enough self-control to say, "I can still help you, if you'd like."
Legolas smiled a little. He could see the hurt on Haldir's face. "Yes, I'd like that." He, for some reason, had always enjoyed having people dress him. Aragorn was, of course, his favorite, but Haldir ran a close second. It was just after Haldir had handed him his knives that he said, "I'm sorry."
To his surprise, Haldir kissed him on the cheek. "I know."
Legolas turned a little to face him and kissed him hard. Haldir kissed him back. He knew that he was only hurting himself, that Legolas didn't love him. "I'm not undressing you," Haldir mumbled as Legolas's capable hands began to fumble at Haldir's tunic. "Not after I spent all this time getting you dressed." Legolas's hands finally found their way in. "You said you didn't have time." But for some reason, his hands began to remove Legolas's clothes. "We're not going to do this."
Legolas pulled away. "Stop talking. I can think of much better uses for that tongue of yours." He pushed Haldir down onto his knees. Though it wasn't really pushing, because no force whatsoever was needed.
"Father!" called a voice.
Legolas groaned. "What?" he snapped.
"Do you know where Commander Haldir is?"
Legolas looked down at Haldir. "No," he called back. Haldir kissed his hip as his hands began to work at Legolas's leggings. Legolas stifled his moan. "Is there anything else?"
"No, father."
"Then, I'm busy, so please go away."
"That was rude," commented Haldir.
"I've told you once already to shut up."
And, for a while, Haldir did. Then Haldir helped Legolas dress again without further comment. Legolas then followed Haldir back to his tent, where Haldir prepared for the upcoming adventure. Before they left, Haldir hugged Legolas fiercely and whispered, "I love you," to him. Haldir saw that Legolas looked shocked, but did not pull away or tell him not to say that.
But then again, he also did not say the same thing back.
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