Legolas carefully undid the last of his braids and picked up his hairbrush. He paused for a moment to regard the bejeweled and heavy item, certainly not to be found in any other elf's traveling pack. The elaborate hairbrush was clearly of dwarfish make and exquisitely carved and adorned with all sorts of gems. It was tastelessly ornate by elfish standards, but Legolas treasured it as it was a gift from his lover.

Gimli had likened his hair to silken gold once, with such deeply tender reverence that Legolas blushed with pleasure at the memory. His hair was nothing remarkable by elfish standards, but that gentle comment had prompted him to take more care with his long, morning sun coloured hair.

The unlikely friendship between elflord and dwarf had started when Legolas was grieving for Gandalf in Lorien, when Gimli had softened his teasing remarks to genuine words of sympathy. The long boat journey afterwards had deepened this friendship into something profound, and infinitely more tender.

They had made love shortly after the war was over, during a brief adventure en route home. They spent much time apart, both with heavy responsibilities to their peoples, but visits to their mutual friend Aragorn, now King, in the heart of his new capital at Minas Tirith, allowed time for love.

The fair elf tossed his hair back over his shoulders and opened the gift Gimli had given him after an impromptu lovemaking session in the woods that afternoon. Aragorn had been very surprised that both highly skilled warriors had produced not a single kill after a whole day of "hunting" before the night's feast in their honour.

Legolas was delighted with the lamb's wool night robe in the simply wrapped package, meant to deceive prying eyes. It had been dyed the colour of his hair and felt as soft and fluffy on his skin as it felt from the outside.

He checked the wrappings for the belt that would keep the robe shut when tied at the waist but found nothing. The dwarf was up to some delightful mischief, doubtless.

Just then, there was a knock at his door.

Legolas opened the door in an eye blink, careful to hold his robe shut at the collar.

Gimli hurried into the room shutting the door behind him. Both were sensitive to the need to keep their affair a secret.

The elflord beamed at his lover, delicate features alight with love and passion, wrapped in the fluffy yellow night robe.

"Now there's a sight for sore eyes!" the dwarf growled good-naturedly.

"Although, it might be even better...," Gimli shot a quick hand up the robe to caress a slender thigh.

Legolas slapped his hand off, "brazen dwarf! You have already enjoyed me earlier and would be hard pressed to coax me into giving you that pleasure again today." A mock glare followed this statement.

"Ah, my ferocious elf friend, do not glare at me. You know the effect those eyes have on my soul," Gimli said with an infectious belly laugh.

Gimli had fallen in love with Legolas from the moment the elflord glared at him at the Council of Elrond. Here was an elf with fire in his belly and beauty enough to make the woods sigh.

Legolas laughed and knelt down. He gave Gimli's beard a couple of playful tugs, then kissed him.

"May I play with your beard, friend dwarf?" the elf asked, eyes dancing with mischief. With a graceful move too quick for mortal eyes, Legolas shrugged off the robe and knelt naked before his lover.

"You and no other," Gimli breathed. A few urgent kisses later, Legolas drew back and waved a warning finger at the eager dwarf.

"Mind you do not mine too deeply and too greedily friend dwarf," he cautioned, making a humorous allusion to Moria. The laughter kept the real pain from Gimli, Legolas knew, and it was a private and treasured on-going joke.

"Ha! And would there be a Balrog hidden in the bottom of fairest Legolas to hinder my 'mining'?" demanded Gimli with a lewd chortle.

Legolas clapped a hand over his mouth to smother his own giggles at this naughty comment. "Well, any dwarf worth his axe should check for such possible dangers..."

Legolas was soon leaning against a sturdy Gondorian closet as Gimli explored his most intimate opening with an eager tongue. Legolas moaned and arched his back, as he was caressed, penetrated and moistened with infinite care and skill.

The lovers were suddenly interrupted by an urgent hiss at the door, "Legolas, Legolas, help!"

It was Aragorn!

Legolas whirled around as Gimli dived under the sturdy wooden bed. Now was not the time to share news of their love with Aragorn, as such a shock might detract from what must be the king's rampant enjoyment of the delights of his new wedding bed.

Legolas pulled on his night robe and admitted Aragorn.

The king of Men on Middle Earth was dressed in the remnants of a night robe made of some flimsy elfish material, which had been recently ripped to shreds by very strong arms. His hair was in disarray and his eyes were wide with terror. He looked, well, he looked ravished if that was at all possible for a man.

"Aragorn? Aragorn, are you alright?" Legolas asked anxiously.

A soft cooing could be heard in the corridor. "Strider my love," it was Arwen's dulcet tones, "where is my precious love slave? Don't make me come and find you, you naughty Ranger." A peal of girlish giggles followed this statement.

Legolas cocked an eyebrow.

Aragorn leapt into the Gondorian closet and slammed the door shut behind him.

Arwen knocked on the door and Legolas popped his head out.

"Oh, greetings Legolas. I am sorry to trouble you at rest, but I was wondering, have you seen Aragorn?" she asked, her face pale and lovely and innocent and pure in the moonlight.

"He dashed right past me," Legolas said. Well, Aragorn had, but the elf need not add that the king had dashed right past him into his closet.

"Tell him I am looking for him if he runs by again," Arwen said. "Good night, my dear Legolas."

"Good night, Arwen, Queen of Gondor," Legolas inclined his head gracefully, then shut the door.

"She is gone, Aragorn," Legolas whispered.

The dresser opened a crack, then Aragorn stepped out shakily and sat down on the edge of the bed, drawing the shreds of his robe and his dignity around him. He shut his eyes and he looked terribly burdened.

Legolas sat down next to him and put his arms around the man. "Confide in me, my dear friend," Legolas said quietly.

"Oh, Legolas. You are yet unmarried, I am not sure if you would understand such such," Aragorn waved his hand and glared wildly into the torch lit room's interior.

"Intimate matters?" Legolas asked.

Aragorn peered at him.

"Aragorn, elves live for thousands of years. There are not enough wars and hunts and intrigues to keep us all occupied all of the time, and because marriage is a serious undertaking for those who live forever, well, we do allow ourselves a few indulgences. No elflord or elflady is ignorant in these matters for long. Did you not notice this while you were with Elrond's household?" Legolas asked.

"There was no sex in Rivendall, not for me at any rate," Aragorn said glumly. Then, suddenly unable to suppress his emotions any longer while in Legolas's comforting embrace, the usually stoic man blurted, "I must be thrice damned for saying such a thing but I think Arwen is a fiend!"

Legolas drew back, startled.

"On our first night together, she leapt upon me and rode me as if I were one of her father's steeds. Imagine my horror, after half a lifetime imagining sweet and gentle kisses, breathless, coy glances and the joys of discovering such pleasure together! And then she proceeded to torment me in the strangest ways.

"One night she wanted me to pretend she was a rampaging orc and I had to fight her off and then succumb to be despoiled naked. She was like a wild woman! The next night she wanted to bind me to the bedpost before taking her pleasure. Legolas, I am a man besieged. I never imagined marital relations would be thus!

"All these years I remained true to her in heart and mind, I went to her pure. And tonight, tonight...Legolas, she kissed me in unspeakable places!" Aragorn's tirade had spent itself and now he just looked drained.

Gimli snorted under the bed.

Aragorn started, but Legolas snorted delicately twice to hide the interruption.

"Sorry, Aragorn, a slight nose tickle," Legolas said with a disarming smile.

Aragorn looked suspicious, then continued.

"Legolas, I do not know from where she draws her inspiration. I was lying on the bed, trying to rest after the rigours of tonight's feast, when she sneaks up on me, elven quick, tears my robe from my body, and proceeds to kiss me on the on the," here Aragorn's voice quavered. Legolas's eyes had been growing wider and wider. Earlier that afternoon, while indulging in a post coital cuddle, the elf had noticed movement from the edge of the clearing where Gimli and he had been making love. The dwarf had been 'mining' Legolas with fingers, tongue and sex as usual, and much to the elflord's delight. Perhaps Arwen had gotten her inspiration from that?

Legolas felt a naughty finger creep our from under the bed and stroke his ankle. A moment later this was followed by the sweetest little kiss.

Aragorn was too mired in misery to notice anything unusual.

"Aragorn," Legolas began quietly. "I think perhaps Arwen is trying too hard to excite you. For years, elves have grown up listening to the tales of mortal lovers, and their high drive and urgency for love and intimacy before they pass the summer of their lives. And there are novels and tales a plenty and enough palace gossip to fuel an elf's romantic imagination for eternity.

She clearly desires you greatly, and the wait has been long and hard with all the dangers you have had to face, and all this makes you dearer to her. There is nothing fiendish or unnatural about Arwen, perhaps she has just unleashed her adventurous and passionate nature too quickly and suddenly even for a mortal man in her attempts to please you. Talk to her plainly Aragorn, and ask her to share with you the sweet and gentle nature that so captured your heart, and to put aside elven misconceptions about the creativity and aggressive urgency of human love, until you are both eager for it."

"Besides, you should be thankful that she wants to kiss you everywhere," and here Legolas broke into a charming and wicked little smile, "my advice to you is to lie still, King of Gondor, and be glad."

Legolas rubbed his right heel affectionately against Gimli's hand, now clasped around his left ankle.

Aragorn looked relieved. "Sometimes I wonder if I will ever truly understand elves. You are very wise, Legolas, and I think your love would be very lucky indeed."

Legolas beamed with pleasure and saw Aragorn out with a good luck hug.

Gimli crawled out from under the bed, holding Legolas's the belt for the elflord's robe. "I am you know, very lucky indeed."

"How sweet your tongue is, friend Gimli," Legolas said with a twinkle in his eye.

"You know, I never guessed Arwen had so much imagination," here Gimli cracked into a grin, "have you ever been tied to a bedpost, fair Legolas? I do a rather good orc impression..."